Tilly Dally’s Funmusement Park announced on Wednesday (March 10) the construction of a new ride that answers the question: “What would the stock market feel like if it were a roller coaster?” The ride, codenamed “Operation Quantitative Pleasing”, is modeled after the historical chart of the S&P 500. It starts…

The popularization of self-destruct buttons over the last few years has grappled the commodity industry. But after one Missouri mom saw her little Chucky’s Red Riding Wagon explode in their front yard, she began to ask some questions. “Why did my son’s wagon have a self-destruct button?” was one of…

The Star Wars franchise has been well-received for almost 50 years now, and it doesn’t seem to be leaving us any time soon; and for good reason. The series tends to play it safe when it comes to controversial topics such as race, religion or homosexuality. …

Josiah Bennett spent his Monday morning no different than he does his Tuesday mornings, Thursday mornings, Saturday mornings and Easter weekends — radiating hot a cup of frozen stew while his favorite morning radio show Giuseppe and the Sound Farm provided background noise. But this Monday morning ended up different…

Though all evidence from the famous Bobo Doll experiment showed that children are not innately violent, researchers across America stumbled across an anthropological breakthrough when the famous clown was replaced by a different punching bag. Dr. Oomlau Kamde said that he noticed a strange trend out of his kids whenever…

The British show host was brutally attacked by a Muppet superfan for his snide remarks about Elmo’s basketball abilities — Popular host James Corden, after being accused of gayface by millions after portraying a flamboyant gay man in Ryan Murhphy’s film/musical “The Prom,” Corden finds himself in yet another bath of hot water which, this time, is being heated by Muppet fans. In an interview with The LA Times last…

Elbow noodles have long stood as a staple of Italian American cuisine, but what do we really know about them. Harvard elbow scientist Doug McGugg has done a little bit of research on the matter, and found shocking results. It seems that for decades, the American public has been under…

Peter Uglato stepped out his front door on Monday morning (Feb. 15) donned in his red and yellow checkered bathrobe matched with a pair of lightning-patterned boxer briefs. …

The second impeachment trial of Donald Trump came to a conclusion on Saturday (Feb. 13) with the Senate determining Donald Trump responsible for inciting the riot on the Capitol that took place Jan. 6 and sentencing him to 10 years of being a naughty little boy. “His words we cannot…